Stalemate

Every deep relationship has its ups and downs; there are times when, no matter how hard you both try, you and your loved one are simply not on the same page.

Psychology tells us that we tend to grow and retract, fly and crawl, take hesitant two steps forward and one step back, in our long journey into true adulthood. The problem occurs in close relationships because no two people perform this little dance at the same rate for the entire course of their life together.

There are times when you are simply not in sync, and you might gaze at your loved one across the room and suddenly realize that you’re living with an intimate stranger.  The unbelievable part of it, of course, is the certainty that at some point, your intimate stranger has looked at you and realized the same thing!

Patience, and the willingness to not give up on each other, seem to be essential ingredients.

And love, of course…always love.

We find ourselves on opposite sides
of a wide crevasse,
a deep canyon –
gazing at each other
across the chasm,
neither of us able
to make the leap.

We send messenger pigeons
across the void,
hopeful, to pass the word –
written, sadly,
in different languages,
so that our deepest meanings
are lost in translation.

We stare at each other
across the gorge,
wondering what on earth
is really being said,
over there.

Desperately we mime
our siren call of need,
while there on the opposite
side of the abyss,
the other looks on
in silent wonder
at the calisthenics,
or yawns
and wanders off to bed.

And all the love in the world
will not give us wings.

[1992]

Namaste,
Susannah